Wednesday, June 23, 2010

Overwhelmed with sadness…

Today is Wednesday. It has been two days since we received the news…

Our Grandmother passed away on Monday afternoon.

She was my husband’s Grandmother on the maternal side. I called her Grandma Hana, but pretty much everyone called her Grammy-

My husband keeps telling me that she’s had a very fulfilling life… that she was just old. She would have been 89 come this July. I actually have only met and known her for just over the past two very short months. Those two short months, for me, were a very special gift to me…

She was just lovely. I felt as though I have known her for a very long time… she made me feel so welcome and I instantly felt right at home. Just wish I had spent more time with her and I am sure she would have liked to share a lot more with me as well.

The second visit we had was over Mother’s Day weekend. I wanted to give her something that was personal, and also wanted her to remember me by so I decided to knit a lap throw for her :) she seemed cold all of the time even though her house is kept very warm. I had no idea what colors she liked nor what textures she would prefer, for she also is a seasoned knitter/crocheter, but I wanted to surprise her… So, I ventured out to find what I thought would be fitting for her and just went with it.

I worked diligently since I had a deadline to meet and just knitted my afternoons/nights away. I do have a full-time day job, ya know?

I bound off the last stitch… embellished some knitted flowers on it… blocked the piece… carefully wrapped it… only then, I was able to relax… however, that was short lived :(

I started to worry about what if she doesn’t care for it? what if she hates the color? what if? what if? Many “what ifs” later, I came to a realization that she will love it no matter what because it was knitted by my own two hands and made especially for her AND because she is a knitter herself, she will appreciate it.

Guess what?

I was right.

I noticed whenever we visited after Mother’s Day, Grandma Hana had the throw over her lap whenever she sat down in her chair. Oh, it made me feel so happy~ I am very glad that I was able to give her a gift that will keep her warm and cozy.

Ah… I will miss you very much, Grandma Hana…

I want you to know that you will always, always be remembered by me, Grandma Hana.

I am so very grateful that the last time I saw you in the hospital, you were alert and that you remembered me as well.

I will remember your smile when I said, “Good Night~”